Fred Meets My Girlfriend

My girlfriend Tina had just parked her car in front of my building and was about to walk upstairs to meet me. Before she could get to the door she ran into my neighbor, Fred. He was fixing his car dreaming of the day that he could get his license back, when the sight and smell of a young woman took him out of his automotive trance. And since the walls were thin and Fred was loud, I could hear the whole exchange from my sofa.

Fred: [Doffing his cap and flipping back his greasy hair] Can I help you with something, Miss?

Tina: That’s OK, I know where I’m going. [Tina pointed at my place and moved to the front door]

Fred: [Also moving to the front door] You know…I’ve lived here for YEARS and know just about everyone here. Who you going to visit?

Tina: I’m going to visit my boyfriend.

Fred: Who’s your boyfriend?

Tina: He just moved in, he lives on the 2nd floor.

Fred: You mean that boy? Up in that place [he pointed at my window]?