The Bad Guy

Yes, I do realize that Jello did this already…

…But I’m going to share my list of band names I’d like to see used, too. Mind you, unlike Jello’s list, these band names are not public domain. If your band uses one of these I expect some money. I have pages of these things, but I’m only posting a few now. If you like them, I’ll post more.

-Bill Cosby Rules!

-Let’s Go To Scotland


-No, YOU Suck!

-We Do Drugs, Lots Of Them.

-Yes, I Started A Band With My Girlfriend

-The Nam

-Your Tax Dollars At Work

-Songs About The Government & Weed

-Doctoral Thesis On Don Rickles

-Low Interest Bone (Get it? Get it? I said “bone” instead of “loan.”)

-Obscure Reference To A Book I Read So Some Girl Would Fuck Me.

-Get Tested

-We Don’t like The President Very Much

-The Red Skelton Hand Job

-My Bitch Muse Keeps Teasing Me With Night Ranger Songs.

-I’m On Break

-30 Minutes Of Broken Dreams & Denial

-Elves Would Be Cooler If They Weren’t So Gay <-(I heard someone say this on the train to work and couldn’t get it out of my head.  Now it’s in yours.)

-I Got Your Free Bird hangin’ Low

-Van Halen, Now THERE Was A Band!

-The Ever Stylish Vagina

-Lie Back And Think Of England

-Lie Back And Think Of A Band You Like

-Roy Cohn’s Bidet

-We’re SOOOOOOO High Right Now

-The Break-Away Republic Of Suck My Dick

-The International House Of Bitch-Slaps

-In 5 Years We’ll Be Those Guys At Guitar Center That You Make Fun Of

-Ditched At Burning Man

-The Grateful Dead Always Sucked And We Sound Just Like Them


May 13, 2007 - Posted by | band names, rock music


  1. The best one I thought of and never used was Afterbirth of the Cool. Of yours, “The Grateful Dead Always Sucked, etc.” was truly marvelous, as was “The Ever Stylish Vagina”, though I’m wondering if that’s missing a hyphen, and if so, if it’s a sly riff on a missing hymen…

    How about:

    Dennis Miller Is Not An Intellectual. Seriously.
    Ask Not For Whom The Gristle Throbs
    Your Wet Stylesheet Template On My Hot Rich Text

    Comment by Pierce Inverarity | May 14, 2007 | Reply

  2. How about California Vagina Sailors? Yes, I’ve been on a Yacht Rock fix all weekend.

    Comment by Myrtle | May 14, 2007 | Reply

  3. I’ll have to rediscover “Yacht Rock.” I’ll go check out Channel 101 later tonight.
    And to Mr. Inverarity, “The Ever Stylish Vagina” was not a riff on “Missing Hymen.” And upon reflection, I’m a little unhappy that I didn’t think of that one. And you may be right, perhaps a hyphen was in order for TESV.

    Comment by thebadguy | May 14, 2007 | Reply

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