Abe Lincoln and why I hate my job.

I got to my job today and got into a conversation with a guy I work with. A conversation that I really wish had not happened.

“Who discovered America?” He asked me.

Worried about where this was going I decide to go the boring route. The boring route being the “Cliff Claven” way. Usually this will annoy folks to the point of dropping the subject altogether:

“You mean which people crossed the land bridge from Asia? Or are you talking about which European holds that honor? Because that’s another discussion. You know, there are Vikings and even Irish monks who have claimed to have found a new world before the late 1400’s.”

The guy I work wth, uh…Josh, was not into dropping the subject. He gets to his point.

“You know how they say Abraham Lincoln discovered America?”

“No.”

“Well, who do you think first started that story?”

“You did.” I start getting annoyed and decide to cut the guy some slack.

“I really hope you’re talking about Christopher Columbus. Is that who you really mean?”

“Huh?”

“You know Columbus? He sailed over here with three ships from Spain, has a holiday named for him?”

“What did Abraham Lincoln do, then?”

“Sixteenth president of the U.S., lead the country during the Civil War, got shot in the head by John Wilkes Boothe, liked dudes? Any of this ringing a bell?”

“But this Columbus guy, what was he?”

“Where was he from?”

“Yeah!”

“Italy.”

“Really?

“Yeah.”

With his head swimming from having his whole world view shattered, Josh went home. A stunned resident who witnessed the entire exchange gave me a look. I perked up and told him “Josh is technically my boss.”